new decisions.

i have to admit that its been difficult lately. for every reason, for no reason at all. nothing has happened (but of course, everything is new and different. yet, it isn't. ha!).

so, i will write all my goals down. i will try not to plan too far ahead. i will stay constant in this moment, but will get ready for what is to come.

an example of how dumb i used to be (and continue to become aware of, now) was when i was in paris, france two years ago with my sister, christina. i remember this very clearly. i said, "i want to live in paris. i could live in paris. you don't even need to speak french!"

which may be true, maybe theorhetically.

i could also live in tokyo, japan without speaking or understanding japanese. i've lasted almost two months thus far. however, I REFUSE! so...i am going to get down to business, y'all.

first order of business: learn japanese the cheapest way possible.
next order of business: learn french in the similar style of cheapiness.

so, then maybe i can actually live in paris like for real.

(i'm not planning to move to paris in the near to comprehendible future, but i would like to learn some french. so many french people live in tokyo! its amazing! teach me your language french people! and i will exchange to you english! by the way, this is a very common way to advertise here in tokyo.)

third: graduate school. probably california. probably san francisco. yup.
fourth: india next summer.
fifth: invest in a new camera (soonish. maybe when i actually get a real-looking paycheck. holla.)

and i will conclude with,

taurus: if only things could be perfect and then just stay that way. forever. how boring would that be? as unsettling as it is to have lightning-quick uranus shake up your solar twelfth house of dreams and karma, what looks like ruins at the moment may clear the way for what you really want. the heartfelt sun lights up life at home beginning this tuesday.