culture shock and expat lessons.

tomorrow i teach a discussion class on cultural differences, living abroad, culture shock, foreigners, etc.

for some reason, i never thought that i was an Expat...but an expat is just someone who lives in a foreign country. i suppose i'm an expat? 

i have a negative understanding of expats, but maybe that's just american culture? if you live in another country, you're betraying your own? america all the way? long live freedom and democracy and rodeos and free gun laws and all that?

but the thing is, i'm not planning on permanently living abroad in a foreign country. although, the more i think about my plans for the future the more i want to live abroad. its been an invaluable experience.

also, i don't think its difficult to move to a foreign country. i think people who think its difficult are just lazy or afraid to do it.

one of the vocabulary words for tomorrow's lesson is xenophobia. 

i think i'm past the culture shock of japan....and although i denied having it, i'm pretty sure it was just an overall slow process for me. it wasn't one particular event, but maybe the first 5 months or so? 

and i think i'm already experiencing reverse culture shock, without even going back to america. or maybe its just personal life shock...looking back on my life. i shock myself.

WE'RE JUST ALL PART OF THE UNIVERSE, MAN.

haha. i'm so lame.

realization.

i have this theory:

some japanese person got some bootlegged copy of Star Trek circa 1965 and decided that's how tokyo should be. and TA-DA...welcome to how pamela dylag sees tokyo circa 2009!!!

also, do you think i could pass as a japanese school girl? i really want some discounted disneyland tix F'REAL.

beauty.

today i was called beautiful and elegant by two different women.

one of the first things i heard this morning: "Whoa! I didn't recognize you! I thought I got a new BEAUTIFUL teacher because you usually don't look beautiful."

i think i remember more when women remark on beauty. because especially japanese women are so fickle to say "beautiful". they throw away "cute" like its nothing...but to be elegant is different. 

same with men. i can tell if a man really takes the time to say i'm beautiful. boys, you always throw around those silly words like "hot". i get so uncomfortable with that word. also, i think its really silly.

but you know what? EVERYONE IS BEAUTIFUL! seriously. 

oregon?

i have this student that is in love with me, and in turn, i have fallen for her. i think i've mentioned this before, but she's taken my class every week since july. and every week, she brings me some gift. its usually something sweet, or a loaf of bread, or a coach purse (oh man), or little mini bottles of assorted chocolate liquers from russia, or some pink food because she LOVES the color pink (she wears pink head-to-toe DAILY)...

a while ago, she told me about this place called the Oregon Grill (she knows i lived in portland before). today, she took me there. it's on the 42nd floor of this enormous building in Shimbashi, overlooking all of tokyo. i always forget how gigantic tokyo is until i'm overlooking it in some super tall building. and of course, there was a view of the Tokyo Tower all lit up.

this place was really fancy. we went up this elevator (these japanese elevators, man. they are crazy sometimes...the lights become brighter the closer you get to the floor you're going to. unless that's a normal fancy place elevator thing? i don't know! i don't know fanciness!) and my ears popped because we were so high. and then, the first thing you see is this mock Governor of Oregon office (???) because DUH, WE'RE AT THE OREGON GRILL! 

haha, man...i can't explain this whole theme thing that japan is obsessed with. but, its not like you can just name a restaurant the Oregon Grill WITHOUT having some weird theme with it (i.e. the mock governor office) EVEN IF this is a super fancy four star restaurant. its just so hilarious to me because the japanese are SO GOOD at imitating other cultures even if its completely unnecessary.

and at one point, my student told the waitress "she's from oregon!" (about me) and i'm just laughing because that probably means NOTHING to the waitress. haha.

ANYWAY, i never thought that when i moved to tokyo i would get to go on super fancy dinners on a semi-frequent basis for FREE SUCKA. man, this whole english-teacher-foreigner-american-rosy cheeked-white toothed-young lady card isn't so bad sometimes. i shouldn't ever bitch about anything anymore. 

i learn the hard way.

i think its best for me to learn the hard way. its generally the only way i understand things, by experiencing it first hand. it works for me. other people get annoyed by it, with me. i think that's why a lot of people think i lack "common sense" which is probably true. i can totally come off like an airhead. recently i've recorded my voice and now i get what everyone is talking about: my intonation, my voice inflections come across as completely insincere and flighty. I STRAIGHT UP TALK LIKE A VALLEY GIRL! man, i know i do. i know i know i KNOW. i know what i sound like, its probably one of my biggest insecurities. let it be known: my voice is my biggest insecurity. because when i say something like "thank you so much. i really appreciate it." and it sounds hella rude, i hate it! ah!

whoa.

anyway...i'm glad i didn't know shit like randomly told to go out onto the streets of tokyo to hand out my school's fliers to people walking by before i moved to tokyo. i'm glad the corporation i work for doesn't say those things to prospective english teachers. because i probably would've been all-like NO WAY! because i am totally ABOVE that shit...but now, hell no I TOTALLY GO OUT ONTO THE STREETS OF TOKYO AND HAND OUT FLIERS FOR MY SCHOOL. YUP. IT'S TOTALLY PART OF MY JOB. 

and if you're reading this and you have a certain tone in mind for how this should come across, i want you to know that the intended tone for this post should be something of SUPREME AND UTTER HAPPINESS AND CONTENT WITH EVERYTHING. at least, its what i strive for.

i want these experiences. i want this thrown into my face. i want to see different perspectives, different points of view. 

do you know how awesome it is to stand on the street in a gigantic neon blue parka, handing out fliers to japanese people in tokyo? when they acknowledge you, and look into your eyes they are at first puzzled. most high school girls giggle and scream "kawaii!!!" and then you laugh and then they scream with even more vigor.

when i look into faces, i really look. i want to feel these faces. sometimes there's a deep frown or a deep concentration to not look at anyone else, but to keep walking/pushing forward. other snarl. some laugh and smile (usually if they're with a friend). these faces i love to look at. to understand, to feel. people are stuck in their heads, in their worries and fears and hatred and annoyance or whatever else is putting them into a trance. these walking zombies, these shells of people. and i wonder when their lives will fill up again. i wish i could shake people and laugh and hug them and scream "THIS IS IT!!! DON'T YOU GET IT?! STOP WITH THIS NONSENSE! BE HAPPY! LOVE! BE FREE OF YOURSELF!"

my alternative is to promise these things to myself and smile. offer positivity and love and hope. that's all i can do.

japan is a place. just a place. its different than other places, but generally the same. people are the same everywhere. they either live in fear or live in love. 

afrirampo!

yes!yes!yes!

AFRIRAMPO!

i am in love with these girls. so fun!!!

BEST.

WEEKEND.

EVER.

thankyouverymuch.

melt banana!

i just got back from seeing MELT BANANA! 

oh my goodness gracious!

some other amazing japanese noise/dance/amazingness played and i am so dizzy and my ears are ringing and i feel pretty close to PERFECT right now!

I LIVE IN TOKYO!

wow.

GLOBAL SHOUT-OUT!

i just wanna give a GLOBAL SHOUT-OUT to all da peeps in my life!

OH MY GOODNESS! LIFE IS SO GRAND!

the weather is so beautiful in tokyo. the sun is so bright and shiny! and i discovered if you're nice to people, they cannot help it but extremely nice back to you! so be nice to people, and they'll love you forever! its totally true!

ALSO THE LOVE OF MY LIFE JESSICA EMERALD ADAME WILL BE HERE SO SOON! YES!

and i get to see one of the amazing girls from AFRIRAMPO play in tokyo this sunday! and its almost valentine's day and i am filled with so much love and everyone in the world is my valentine. so, HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO EVERYONE!

oh, man. spring makes me crazy.

WEAK-END.

highlights from my weekend:

1. experiencing the experience of selling used clothes in tokyo for the first time.

this might not seem interesting, but if you don't know...i worked at three used/vintage clothing stores in my brief history, spanning around four years (partly to blame b/c of college, partly to blame because of portland). i have sorted through enough hobo's dirty laundry to last me a lifetime. anyway, i sold some things to this random used clothing store in harajuku...and, MY OH MY it was weird. first of all, it was super fancy which kind of intimidated me because i was selling some not-at-all-fancy things (we're talking leather couches and champagne). then, of course i was served some beverages (i opted for oolong tea, still cold-stone-sober) and cookies while i waited for them to go through my lame clothes i brought there. finally, i was escorted to a separate room where they showed me they took two things and then gave me 50,000 yen for them!!!! 50,000 yen = $50 USD. holler.

2. i bought the most HORRENDOUS shoes for work, and they're called "office walkers" (i presume this is a sort of coin on the term "office worker"...which most people in tokyo describe as what they do for work.)

you would think that tokyo would make me spend every last penny i have on some weird japanese clothes, but it is quite the opposite. i'm just going to make a random guess that 80% of my wardrobe is black. i kind of hate clothes right now (maybe because at work i have to dress super lame-like). if you lived in portland circa 2006-2008, do you remember how i dressed?! for god's sake, i proudly wore neon orange high waisted stretch pants from the 1980s for crying out loud.

3. as i walked home just now, a fellow foreigner said hello to me! 

foreigners never ever EVER say hello to other foreigners! and it was my neighbor! ok, its not such a big deal but it made me pretty happy.

4. i concocted my own veggie burger patty recipe.

i fear that i may be returning to my old vegetarian ways...maybe i gorged myself with too much meat these past 9 months? ugh. but, i'm avoiding meat. except fish...i still like fish a lot.

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!

i teach tomorrow, but then i have wednesday off. horray for random japanese holidays every other week that sometimes fall on a working day! horray!

mori art museum.

on monday, i decided to take a day trip to the mori art museum in roppongi.

roppongi is bizarre. 

as soon as you step into that ward, you feel like you're in some alternate-style america. everything is in english. everything! i mean, that isn't to say that most of tokyo is in english...but in roppongi, the english is in bigger font than the japanese. 

so, the mori art museum is part of the mori tower in this ginormous complex known as Roppongi Hills. this place is insane. i tried to take some pictures, but its so big that i couldn't really get a good shot to give it any justice. its filled with about a million designer stores, movie theatres, restaurants, some of the most expensive apartments in tokyo, and of course the mori art museum.

roppongi is the site of the american embassy, so you see lots of foreigns walking around. i mean, its nice and all...but it freaks me out. i can't even imagine how much money was put into this place.

the mori art museum was on the 53rd floor of the mori tower. when you buy a museum ticket, you can also stroll around the observation deck that overlooks the tokyo tower and all of the city. amazing views! as soon as i stepped into the observatory, i could not stop smiling it was so crazy! 

the museum had this exhibition of current modern art from India. it was pretty good. the museum is huge, and it wasn't crowded so that made it even better. its funny, i only notice when places are not crowded now.